Comments for Ferne Merrylees

Comment on Immortal Prologue 1st Person by Ella

Ella — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 13:22:43 +0000

Hi Ferne,
I enjoyed reading that! I personally liked the third person account more than the first person. Of course, as Alyson says, both versions are great! I think that you still have an insight into her personality through the diary entries and just don’t need it all to be in first person, otherwise the whole book may as well be a diary. I think its doubling up a bit to have first person in the text and in the diary. So put my vote down for third person! And thanks for putting it up for us to read.

Ella
xoxox

Comment on Immortal Prologue 3rd Person by Storme

Storme — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 09:14:53 +0000

The first person is more personal, the 3rd person is not as dramatic somehow. also the line, which is the only somewhat there description of the foster mum, `“It will be good for you.” The darker woman had smiled…` seems awkward with the use of the “darker woman” but i know that this is just a draft, and I picked up a few spelling mistakes. “it would be nice to meet some new people that are more interested in prodding me than holding a conversation.” i think you mean this the other way round in regards to the school children.

but its very good, I’m not sure i can remember very much of the first story, but you writing has certainly been refined. obviously that has a lot to do with the fact that you were only 13 when you wrote it.

so i’m voting first person.

Comment on Immortal Prologue 1st Person by Ferne

Ferne — Sat, 01 Aug 2009 07:50:10 +0000

Thanks for the feedback! So far I’ve got one vote for 1st person and one vote for 3rd person. Personally I can’t even begin to choose.

Comment on Immortal Prologue 1st Person by Alyson

Alyson — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 23:42:11 +0000

Third person is good because you get the first person intimacy in the journal entries and then a wider view for the rest. But they’re both great

Comment on The Four Winds by Annika

Annika — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 08:52:57 +0000

So COOL!!!!!! Oh Ferne, its so good, reminds me of afternoon archery! Ha! So brilliant! Thankyou lovey xxxx

Comment on Immortal Prologue 3rd Person by Ferne

Ferne — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 06:40:28 +0000

There are a few changes. I’ll post the prologue of Immortal in first person as well and maybe have a vote! Most votes for either 1st or 3rd person will result in the book being written that way!

Comment on Immortal Prologue 3rd Person by Annika

Annika — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 06:27:35 +0000

Ferney, I don’t remember Immortal being like this…. I still have a transcript you gave me ages ago… I like it in first person… I like how you’ve incorporated the original prologue as a journal entry though

I love the fact you can write so brilliantly, I wish I had the imagination xx

Comment on Immortal Prologue 3rd Person by Ben

Ben — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 03:31:43 +0000

Awesome!

Comment on Greek Orthodox Easter by Ferne

Ferne — Sat, 18 Jul 2009 07:58:04 +0000

It was scarily awesome. At the time so overwhelming and sometimes down right scary (especially at Athens’ main bus depot) but the weather was worth it and was truly one of those places that was so radically different from home.

Comment on Greek Orthodox Easter by Amy

Amy — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 12:43:31 +0000

Hun, I love this – makes me want to go, but I don’t have a Greek grandmother to borrow, lol. Must’ve been amazing